Nats Enquirer

Mike Rizzo's Baby

 

(Mike Rizzo got a pie in the face and the Silver Elvis wig from Stan Kasten the night the Nats signed Bryce Harper. Screengrab via CSNWashington.com by Nationals Enquirer staff.)

The Nationals announced today that Mike Rizzo has been given a 5-year extension and promoted to Executive Vice President of Baseball Operations to go along with his General Manager title. Congrats to Rizzo, who has come a long way since being hired in 2006 by Jim Bowden to head up the Nationals scouting department.

"There really hasn't been a shortage of my stamp on the organization. I do believe that, with the new responsibility, the new title and, really, the new job description, it will be my baby and my fingerprints will be all over the organization even more so than they are already."
(Mike Rizzo, via Nationals Journal, 10/19/2010)

So, if the Nationals are Mike Rizzo's baby, does that make Jim Bowden Mike Rizzo's babydaddy? Or is it the other way around?

And there's another one there about changing diapers, but we'll leave that alone for now.

Anyway, this five-year extension also means it will be impossible to run Mike Rizzo out of town for failing to sign Adam Dunn this offseason.

If you're interested, here's the complete text of the press release from the Nationals:

Downgrading the Nationals Cliff Lee pipe dream to a crack pipe dream

(Cliff Lee tossed a gem in Game 3 for the Rangers at Yankee Stadium. Photo by UPI/Monika Graff  via Newscom.)

Wow.

And with that eight-inning, two-hit, no-run, 13-strikeout performance by Cliff Lee on Monday night, let us officially downgrade the pipe dream in which the Nationals win a bidding war for Cliff Lee's services in the offseason to a crack pipe dream.

In other words, if you live in NatsTown, and you're still harboring thoughts of the Nationals signing Cliff Lee, you've probably been smoking crack.

Nice of Cliff Lee to give Yankees fans a teaser of what they can expect for the next few postseasons to come with that epic performance in Game 3 Monday night, though. That was one hell of a job interview.

Meanwhile...

Brian Wilson's Beard has nothing on the original G.I. Joe doll...

 

...but then, the original G.I. Joe doll never pitched an inning and a third of scoreless relief to save a game in the NLCS against the Phillies. And the original G.I. Joe doll's beard never had its own Facebook page.

So we'll call it a draw.

No Cliffhanger Here

 

(That's something we'll never get to see Cliff Lee do with the Nationals. Because Cliff Lee will never be a National. Photo by REUTERS/Scott Audette)

The answer to the question "Could the Nationals land Cliff Lee?" can be summed up in two simple words:

Hell no.

No drama here. Don't waste your time dreaming, NatsTown.

The Phillies-Yankees World Series of 2010 hasn't even started, and yet it's already time to hunker down and prepare for a long Winter of being teased by stories of the Nationals being serious players in the Cliff Lee Sweepstakes.

Troy Renck of the Denver Post reported on Friday that the Nationals are making it known that they're ready to spend boatloads of Lerner cash this offseason, and so could presumably be a player in the Cliff Lee Sweepstakes:

About the Bryce Harper Fast Track, and handicapping the date of his 2011 MLB debut

 

(Bryce Harper will play in the Arizona Fall League. Getty Images photo.) 

And so, yes, the Nationals will be sending Bryce Harper to the Arizona Fall League after all. Harper will be a card-carrying member of the Scottsdale Scorpions' "taxi squad"; meaning he's only eligible to play on Wednesdays and Saturdays. MASN's Byron Kerr got reaction from a "stoked" Bryce Harper, who turns 18 on Saturday:

"I am stoked. I am so excited. It has been a goal of mine to be able play in the Arizona Fall league."
(Bryce Harper, via MASNSports.com, 10/13/2010)

 And here's Mike Rizzo on the decision, via Nationals Journal:

He's no Strasburg: Rare Bryce Harper baseball card sells for mere $12,500

 

(Bryce Harper suits up at his introductory press conference in August at Nationals Park. AP Photo)

And so, the Arizona Fall League started last night without Bryce Harper. And Bryce Harper probably won't be heading to the Arizona Fall League this year, although the door is still open (just a crack) according to MASN's Byron Kerr. 

Meanwhile, a super duper rare baseball card, the Bryce Harper Superfractor, only fetched $12,500 in an auction on eBay last week. According to ESPN.com, the Harper card sold to an investment banker from Long Island, NY; and the card (gasp!) has a minor defect. Here's Aaron Marcus, the guy who just paid $12,500 for a baseball card:

Thanks, Bobby...

 

(Above, a photo of the great Bobby Cox cake typo of 2010. Photo is from AJC.com.)

Bobby Cox's Last Stand

And so, the Braves fell in four games to the Giants, and now we doff our caps and pay respects to Bobby Cox for a great career. He had a fantastic run.

Still, nothing beats the work of that Senate catering service earlier this summer.

Thanks for the memories, Bobby.

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Bryce Harper, Homeward Bound (for now)

That's no "oppo boppo": Above, Bryce Harper goes deep in an Oct. 1 instructional league game for the Nationals against the Tigers in Florida.

The Washington Post's Adam Kilgore reported Monday that Bryce Harper will be heading back home to Vegas  with a month of instructional league ball under his belt, and will not report for Arizona Fall League duty -- at least not yet. Guess there's still an outside chance he'll end there, but it's not sounding likely:

Nationals Director of Player Development Doug Harris and General Manager Mike Rizzo will speak in the next few days to decide if Harper's next step includes playing in the AFL. For now, they want to give Harper time to relax and reflect in a comfortable setting.

"He's going to go home," Harris said. "Mike and I are going to talk about it. This is the first time he's really been away from home. He needs to go home."
(Doug Harris, via Nationals Journal, 10/11/2010)

What a difference a year makes: Seems like only yesterday Stephen Strasburg was making his AFL debut for the Nats/Desert Dogs, and Orioles' prospect and AFL teammate Brandon Snyder wore a Strasburg jersey on his way to the team bus, causing a mini-mini-riot. Guess this year an O's prospect in a Sammy Solis or Brad Peacock jersey isn't going to cause the same level of hysteria. Guess we'll have to wait until next October for a Bryce Harper AFL debut. Oh well.

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p.s., This Sucks

(The Phillies broke out the champagne on Sunday night. Reuters Photo by John Sommers II.)

No, not that the Nationals are bringing back their entire coaching staff for (at least the start of) the 2011 season. That's fine.

Just the Phillies.

Because the thought of having no choice but to root for the Yankees at some point in the near future is almost too much to take.

Heck, even the columnists in Philly are noting that the "novelty of October baseball in Philadelphia is a distant memory." Sort of captures the whole spirit of baseball fans in that hellhole of a city.

And it doesn't look like there's anybody around to take 'em down.

Boooooo! Or should that be: boo hoo?

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BOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

(Welcome back to the City of Brotherly Love: Phillies fans heckle Scott Rolen. Photo byTim Shaffer/Reuters.)

"Thank you, Jay Bruce!" (Phillies fans, 10/8/2010)

First no hits, then no defense.

Also, Reds can't catch Phils.

That seventh inning was awful.

But despite his contribution to the hellish 7th, we still wish Aroldis Chapman was a National. Also, Jay Bruce would fit right in around here.

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