(Back in the old days, Matt Chico had his own corner of the Natmosphere. Screengrab of MattChicoRules by Nationals Enquirer staff.)
Stop the presses. There was a time not so long ago when Matt Chico was the best starting pitcher on the Washington Nationals. Think about that for a moment. Just a few years and one Stephen Strasburg surgery (a.k.a. Tommy John surgery) later, Matt Chico has been designated for assignment to clear space on the 40-man roster. Call it a sign of progress?
He could be back on a minors deal; but maybe not. In honor of Matt Chico's tenure with the Nats, we now lovingly copy and paste an excerpt from a classic post on MattChicoRules, the greatest (and only) blog dedicated to Matt Chico there ever was, titled "Patriotism - What America Means to Matt Chico" from July 2007:
The only thing that rules more than America, F--- YEAH, is national icon Matt Chico. Taking the mound on Independence Day, Matt Chico thoroughly dominated the Cubs and the Domincan Benedicto Arnoldo so badly with 7 shut-out innings that the Mall was evacuated and fireworks erupted spontaneously throughout the land. The Boz was so all encompassingly entranced by our hero's guile and moxie that he had to spend the whole week writing nonsensical golf columns, apparently done with baseball as he has now witnessed pitching at its finest. Also, Matt Chico, a Tom Emanski disciple, is quite obviously the nation's most acclaimed bunter. I'm not even joking. The man sacrifices better than Jesus.
But the Romans to our Jesus, clearly, has been the Florida Marlins. On Saturday, Matt Chico ventures to their shitty municipality (TANC IN '08!) to conquer his demons. Shouldn't be too difficult, now that the cowardly #1 enemy of the Chico-sphere, Cody Ross (likely alias), is on the 60 day disabled list with a strained hamstring. Hey Codester, don't let the door hit you in the ------- on your way out of the majors. (via MattChicoRules, 7/12/2007)
Godspeed, Matt Chico.
So has Rizzo signed Brandon Webb yet? How 'bout Pavano?